Hat's off

I am extraordinarily fortunate. I have a husband who loves being a father, and whose career offers some flexibility. Sure, he cringed at the idea of being the first in his faculty to take paternal leave, but since he wasn't teaching the term when Jakob was born, he was able to work from home a lot. Except for teaching, meetings, and seminars, Werner has been able to be there when I need him. I have known all along just how lucky I am.

And I have wondered how single mothers do it. Either those who are really on their own, or those whose husbands have careers with less forgiving hours. At the end of the day, I'm exhausted, but I know sooner or later Werner will be home and will get Jakob ready for bed.

I've always been aware of my good fortune, but since Werner left for Vancouver, I'm even more conscious of how much he helps with Jakob. There are lots of people around here who are eager to hold or play with or feed Jakob, but I'm more or less on my own overnight and until lunch time. Jakob has been waking up early since Werner left, so I feed him and snuggle with him for a while, then put him back into his tent, hoping he'll sleep a little longer. When he wakes for good, I get his breakfast ready. In place of Werner's help, I'm relying on Baby Einstein. (Far from equivalent, but it does help.) I manage to prepare and eat my breakfast by distracting Jakob with a video (bad mommy), and it also buys me enough time to get his breakfast ready, too. I don't get a shower until he's either down for his nap or Nanny gets here to take over. And I've already seen what happens if I dare to take a bathroom break.

To all those who do this on their own for any stretch of time - I'm so impressed with you!